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The Shamballa Letter
VOLUME 15, Number 8 February 19, 1993
Blessed Friends of Truth:
I would like to conclude my series of Letters to you by discussing the subject of self-forgiveness. Forgiveness can be defined as giving the Light of God in exchange for the shadows of human consciousness.
Once a lifestream is firmly established upon the Path of Light, it is often much easier to forgive the misunderstanding of energy by one's fellow-travelers, than to excuse such misunderstanding within oneself. This lack of self-forgiveness is created, in part, by the activity of remorse upon the consciousness.
During my incarnation as Saul of Tarsus, in the early years of the Christian dispensation, I was given the opportunity to master the art of self-forgiveness. Prior to my encounter with Jesus upon the road to Damascus, I was a persecutor of many of the earliest followers of Jesus. After my spiritual awakening, one of the hardest lessons I had to learn was how to create a momentum of self-forgiveness within my consciousness, which would eventually allow me to carry out the work which needed to be done.
One of the most difficult initiations which must be passed by every chela, is facing one's own miscreations, and loving them free. I was able to face this test through the loving ministration of my eternal friends, Mother Mary and John, the Beloved. They spent countless hours working with me, filling me with their Love until I could learn to love myself. John taught me the finer points of the Law of Divine Order. Standing within the Light of this Great Principle, I was enabled to recognize the fact that within the Divine Plan, every particle of energy - when transmuted - can be used for the highest good of all. As Mary and John blazed the Violet Fire through my four lower vehicles, over and over again, I came to regard my past "miscreations" as tools in God's Mighty Hand. I began to understand that the life I had previously led and the grievous "mistakes" I had made created within me a particularly strong empathy and compassion for mankind. I was shown how I could use these tools to build a momentum of healing and truth which would help to awaken even the most determined unbelievers. This momentum, thus begun, has lasted even unto the present day! It was at the moment of my acceptance of the Gift of Forgiveness, that I took upon myself a new Name; from that time forward, I was known as Paul, Apostle of the Christ.
Beloved chelas, any feelings of remorse, which you may experience, are the initial inner stirrings of the process of self-forgiveness. These feelings are the signal from your Inner Christ that it is time for you to take this step in your spiritual journey.
Every experience in the world of form can be regarded as a gift of the Presence of God I AM. Each challenge that is encountered can be used by your Holy Christ Self to sustain and increase the momentum of Forgiveness which was established and anchored into the earth by the great Sacrifice of Master Jesus. If the gift - such as remorse or regret - is not released into the Flame of Forgiveness, it tends to act in a negative fashion, "proving" itself to be a part of you. This is how negativity gains strength and impetus in your lives.
Each life path, stretching over centuries of time, has included every conceivable demonstration of misunderstanding of energy. In other words, there is nothing our chelas haven't experienced, at one time or another, in terms of negative miscreation. Those of you who have faced seemingly insurmountable obstacles upon your path during your present incarnation, are perhaps more fortunate than those who must work to transmute momentums which have been created over centuries of time, and which reside "out of sight", so to speak, in the etheric vehicle. In either case, however, consciousness is the key! Once you have become conscious - through the gift of remorse - of actions and reactions which require transmutation, then your course is clear! You must release such memories into the Violet Fire - loose them and let them go! You are then free to live your life on a basis of conscious cooperation with your Inner Christ. This, my friends, is illumined obedience to the Presence of God I AM within you!
As a chela, you must observe yourself closely and carefully at all times, measuring your outer actions and reactions against what you feel are the proper spiritual actions and reactions. Sometimes you may not like your outer actions and reactions, but they are of inestimable value to your spiritual progress.
I urge you to take time to release your own negative actions or reactions into the Violet Fire of Freedom's Love. Forgiveness is far easier to give than to receive. It is vital that you learn to accept forgiveness for yourselves. Until you are capable of receiving this great Gift of God, rest assured that I will joyfully perform for you the service which was so graciously extended to me so very long ago: I will surround and enfold you in my love, until you are able to accept the Truth of this Love for yourself!
Your Friend in Loving Service, Hilarion